Introduction
Lawyer Steve Benmor’s insightful piece in Law360 Canada has spotlighted a question that resonates deeply across Canadian courtrooms: Do judges remember what it’s like to be solicitors of record? Benmor highlights the intense demands, unrelenting stress, and heightened scrutiny that family law lawyers experience—especially in high-conflict custody disputes. His observations serve as a sobering reminder of the reality many parents face when entrusting their legal fate to an overburdened system. Below, we reflect on Benmor’s analysis and explore why it matters for anyone navigating #familylaw or #divorce proceedings in Canada.
Educational Breakdown
The Role of a Solicitor of Record
A solicitor of record is the legal professional who formally represents you in a family law or custody dispute. This role involves:
- Filing and managing court documents.
- Communicating with the other party’s counsel.
- Providing strategic guidance and advocacy in court.
- Ensuring compliance with procedural deadlines and the ever-evolving landscape of Canadian family law.
In high-conflict custody situations, the solicitor of record becomes an essential ally in mediating disputes or vigorously presenting your case before a judge.
The Challenges and Pressures
Benmor calls attention to the growing complexity of this role. Judges may forget the day-to-day realities, including:
- Constant pressure to file motions, respond to urgent court requests, and manage client relationships.
- Balancing ethical obligations (zealous advocacy vs. not misleading the court).
- Shouldering emotional and psychological tolls—especially in emotionally charged custody battles.
These challenges can intensify if the client is in an abusive dynamic, or if manipulative behaviors from the opposing party make negotiations nearly impossible.
Impact on High-Conflict Custody Cases
In the heat of a custody battle, the solicitor of record must juggle:
- Protecting the child’s best interests.
- Dealing with hostile emails or interactions from the other side.
- Maintaining professionalism and focus while advocating under intense judicial scrutiny.
According to CLEO and Steps to Justice, when children are involved, courts hold solicitors to higher standards of thoroughness and clarity, adding yet another layer of accountability and stress.
Real-Life Scenarios or Common Questions
- “My lawyer seems overwhelmed. Should I be worried?”
It’s natural for lawyers to juggle multiple cases. Open communication is key: schedule a meeting to discuss deadlines, strategy, and any concerns. - “How do I handle personal disagreements with my solicitor?”
Try maintaining a professional tone in your communications. If the solicitor's performance is severely lacking, consider seeking a second opinion or contacting Legal Aid Ontario if eligible. - “Is it normal for court paperwork to take so long?”
Yes, especially in complex custody disputes. Family courts handle a large volume of cases, and your solicitor must navigate procedural rules outlined by the Ontario Court Forms. Patience, paired with thorough follow-up, is essential. - “What if my solicitor and the judge don’t see eye to eye?”
Different perspectives are unavoidable. According to the Department of Justice Canada, judges maintain broad discretion in family law matters. Your solicitor must adapt by ensuring facts are clear and arguments align with legal standards.
Action Steps for Parents
If you’re involved in a high-conflict custody situation or concerned about your solicitor’s pressures, here are some practical steps:
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Clarify Your Concerns
Outline key issues in writing. Be concise, factual, and polite. This helps your solicitor address core problems effectively. -
Stay Organized
Keep a timeline of incidents and important documents. Use the Report An Incident tool to create a neutral, legally classified summary. This can be invaluable when communicating with your lawyer or preparing for court. -
Manage Hostile Communications
If you’re receiving aggressive or manipulative emails, try the Email Law Buddy service. It applies the BIFF method—Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm—to help you de-escalate and respond effectively. -
Analyze Your Legal Strategy
Unsure about the next move? The Family Law Case Analysis Tool offers tailored insights based on your jurisdiction and case type. Identify deadlines, forms, and strategic options at your fingertips. -
Stay Informed
Knowledge is power. Resources such as The Law Society of Ontario offer guidance on legal professionalism and how to find the right lawyer if you need alternate representation.
Legal Disclaimer: This blog post is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. For specific legal counsel regarding your situation, consult a qualified family law lawyer licensed in your province or territory.
Navigating #familycourt can be overwhelming, but you’re not alone. Reflecting on Benmor’s central insight—that the complex challenges lawyers face may sometimes be overlooked—can help parents approach their cases with clarity and empathy. Through open communication, smart organization, and the right tools, you can empower yourself and your solicitor of record to achieve the best possible outcome for your family. #CustodyBuddy is here to support you every step of the way.